Wednesday, January 04, 2006


It's happening to everyone! The Arctic Monkeys album has been leaked before it's on sale! How on merry Earth has that happened? In light of this it might not sell by the fucking bucketload anyway.

Whatever will the poor boys do? I imagine that that Alex Monkey bloke will say something self-effacing in the manner he's becoming prone to of late. It's quite charming how he goes "We're a flash in the pan! By January, everyone will hate us anyway! Please, please, don't write anything that makes me look even vaguely big-headed!". How many older brothers must he have waiting at home ready to give him the kicking of his life the moment he becomes remotely cocky? He ought to be declaring "I'm 16 years old or whatever it is and I've already been number one in the pop charts. Our album is going to outsell everything in sight when it's released and let me assure you, should there be any doubters out there, I am currently up to my neck in drugs and fanny".

But he's not. Arctic Pansy.


Anonymous Cal said...

Did i tell you i've got a friend in Sheffield who got into a fight with that antarctic monkey bloke outside leadmill?

It went like this:

My mate: Congratulations on the number one ma...
That Bloke: Just piss off mate- I can't give you a fucking autograph. I just want a night out.
My Mate: Fine- i was just being polite you talentless cunt.
That Bloke: Y'what?


11:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Best regards from NY! Honeywell hcm535 4.0 gallon cool mist humidifier Department of labor 401k fraud Prevent weight gain zoloft

2:49 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home